From the moment you arrived, perhaps even before, people were creating a story about you. Some did this consciously. Others did it without thinking. However it was, you became a Story.
The Child of Salt
Once upon a time a child made completely of salt wanted to understand where she belonged. She traveled to the highest mountains and experienced the breathtaking vistas, but nothing there spoke to her. She traveled to the great deserts and was humbled by their vastness, but nothing here spoke to her, either. She traveled to the wild forests and was entranced by the dark and magical realms, but there was no home for her here.
Finally, she traveled to the shores of the limitless seas. The wind blew in from the waves, lifting her hair and moistening her face. She was called to move closer. The waves spoke in voices strange, yet familiar and she stepped closer. When her foot entered the water, a thrill ran up into her heart. She wanted to know it more and so she walked, step by step, into the sea merging with it as she went. When at last, her head was dissolving into the ocean, she said, “Ahhhhh, now I know who I am!”
Learning our Story is just like this child of salt finding her home. When you observe it and consciously choose it, you will also know who you are. This self-knowledge will allow you to merge with a more powerful reality and experience fulfillment.
Having a Story is like having a car. You can drive to some great places, or you can fall asleep at the wheel and crash. Culturally, we haven’t been taught about our Story Nature. So, you see some beautiful vistas, some engaging sights, and, you crash – most of the time without knowing why. We call this ‘life happens’. Understanding how to see the Story of your life empowers you to make choices about where your trip takes you. You may still crash, but you’ll have a better idea of why, and be better at choosing how to avoid it.
The Don’ts of Dogma
The difference between having a story or living by dogma is the difference between breathing oxygen or breathing carbon monoxide. Story liberates you. Story opens up choices. Story inspires authenticity and self-empowerment. Story maximizes choice and self-direction. Often, we think we are creating Story, when really it is dogma.
You can recognize dogma by its limiting nature. Dogma occurs when we forget that all of our stories are merely the best interpretations that our minds can muster in the face of the unknowable. All stories are metaphors, and if they are not, they are dogma. Dogma is driven by details. Story rides on powerful themes, emotions, ideas, and imagery.
Will there be details in your Story? Yes, definitely, but the details will not be the drivers of your Story. The details will be changeable. If they are not, how can you travel through your Story to your ultimate destination?
Story Aerobics
Story also takes effort. You won’t be able to rely on someone else’s idea of who you are. The work of coming to know your Story is sweaty, spiritual-calorie burning, awareness cardio, thought yoga.
It requires that you first make the choice. Decide. Ask yourself, “Do I really want to know the truth of who I am, because when I do, I’m going to have to live up to it?” The security of having others decide for you will be replaced by the vitality and alertness of designing your life on your terms.
Uncover Your Story
Learning to live by your own Story is like cleaning out your closet. It will require you to empty it, lay all the pieces out before you, try them on for size, discard the ill-fitting or worn out ones, and then, organize what’s left.
You will need the help of someone fluent in Story. Someone practiced in listening for themes and resonant truths who values your autonomy more than your allegiance. A fellow traveler so dedicated to her own journey that her mirror can only reflect the truth of who you are.
You won’t be alone, because you’ll find others who have decided to liberate themselves into their true natures. These are the ones you can trust to reflect how they see you more faithfully and more clearly.